Welcome to my new blog!!!

This is a work in-progress and I am learning how to do this. Please bear with me as this 60-year-old dog learns how to do some new tricks. I hope I can develop this into something that will serve as an alternative to Facebook and their inconsistent post policing methods.

Just Say No to Facebook!!!

My intentions for this blog is for it to be a place for the exchange of ideas, information, open discourse without personal attacks, but most of all as a clearinghouse for the dispersal of information. Since the onset of my disease I have a lot to time on my hands, most of it stuck at home because I am too sick to go out and do anything. Although I intend to continue my activism/advocacy, albeit in a more limited form publicly.

Who is Alfredo LLamedo?

At my core, I am a compassionate, loving, and caring individual that is tolerant of all people, with the exception of those who hate.

I was born in Habana, Cuba in 1959, the year of the Cuban Revolution. My full name is Alfredo "Fidel" LLamedo. I was given the middle-name in honor of Fidel Castro who had just defeated Fulgencio Batista one of many dictators in Cuban history, including Fidel himself. I consider myself a Socialist and respect Fidel for the many socialist programs he instituted in Cuba, like healthcare, education, and housing. I do not respect Fidel and his brother Raul for the way they decided to execute dissidents and rule with iron fists when it came to any opposition to the government. Although, there are always two sides to any story and the other side in this case is the United State's continuous interference, attempts on Fidel's life, the botched Bay of Pigs invasion, and the ongoing economic embargo that has crippled the island and most of all made the Cuban people suffer and did nothing to destabilize or topple the Cuban regime.

Arrived in the USA 1962

I arrived with my parents, Alfredo Sr. & Amanda, my mom's aunt, Amanda, and my younger brother Jorge, who was 1-year younger. We landed in Miami, Florida, but my parents felt that the racial tensions in Miami at the time were a little to volatile to be able to settle in. We were sponsored by the Catholic Church and they gave us the option to relocate to Hoboken, New Jersey, right across the Hudson River from New York City.

My father went to work for a fish market cleaning fish, sweeping, moping, and making deliveries. In Cuba my father and grandfather owned their own business that supplied the Batista government and large businesses with office machines like typewriters, adding machines, and cash registers. We lived comfortably in Habana. Both of my parents had college educations and spoke English. My mom was unable to work due to complications from Multiple Sclerosis and my aunt who cared for her from her early teens, who we called Minina, took care of her and us. Against medical advice my mom gave birth to my younger brother Humberto. My mom passed away at the age of 30 due to complications related to Multiple Sclerosis. I was 11 almost 12, Jorge was 10, and Humberto was 6. Life for me changed at that point, I guess it changed for all of us.

The Beginning

“Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end.” ~ Seneca

I guess the end of my mother's beginning was my new beginning. I didn't care much for my father because he wasn't around much at the end of my mother's life, when in my opinion, was when she needed him most. I'm sure he had his reasons, and some might have been valid, but I just couldn't see them and to this day I still cannot. I made my peace with him before he died and left it there because I didn't want to carry it around with me anymore than I already had.

I had my first suicide attempt when I was about 13, along with many others throughout my teens and into adulthood. I have not had an attempt in almost 10 years, although the suicidal ideations are with me almost daily. It's just part of who I am and I have learned how to work through them so that they do not reach the planning stage, or worse, the attempt. I was first diagnosed when I was almost 13, spent most of my life in institutions, foster homes, and at one point even one of my social workers took me in. Not all of the foster homes were bad, some of them were incredible people, but others were absolutely awful. I was beaten, sexually abused by one of my foster fathers (a middle-school teacher) and 2 of his friends (one of which was also a teacher), I was locked out of the house in the winter at one because they didn't want me in there when they weren't home, slept on the floor in one place, but there were the good ones too. Places that treated me as one of their own, bought me a bike (never forget them, there were 7 of us and two of their own). They were beautiful people with a lot of love to share, but I didn't know how to accept it, so I ran. I ran a lot, even though I shouldn't have in some cases, running away seemed like the only time I felt "okay," even though I was far from it, my mind and heart felt "okay." At times, in-between foster homes I was placed back home with my father and whoever he happened to be married to at the time. Just never seemed to workout.

I spent a lot of time running away from New Jersey, and towards the end, from Miami, FL where my father relocated to and I was placed with him. I was 17, and the state had cut me loose into his custody.

I hopped trains, hitchhiked, and took Greyhounds from the time I was just about 13, until I married my first wife when I was 24 (give or take, not really sure). I have been in every state except Hawaii, couldn't find a freight or a ride to get me there. The road and the streets were different places back then, they are a lot scarier and dangerous now.

Drugs/Alcohol

Drugs and alcohol were a big part of my life from the time I was 12. I started smoking weed, progressed to acid, mescaline, and anything else that could get me high. It was my way to escape the reality of what my life had become and medicate the pain I felt inside because of the loss of my mother. I used all of my life until I got clean in 1992. My final drug of choice was crack cocaine. It almost killed me a few times, but I managed to get help before it took my life. I have been clean from drugs with the exception of marijuana and I drink socially. I believe in rational recovery, so please keep the 12-step lectures to yourself. Recovery is personal, whatever works for you is awesome. I don't knock anyone else's recovery because it's working for them and that's what counts.

The Aftermath

I'm not going to go into all the ins/outs of my life. I have been an open book about who I was before, if you have a question, please ask, I will answer it as long as it doesn't involve the personal lives of my children or grandchildren.

I completed my Masters Degree in Social Work at Eastern Washington University. My Bachelors Degree is an Interdisciplinary Degree with minors in Anthropology and Social Work. I also have AAS's in Automotive Technology and Photography.

Activism/Advocacy

I STAND for many causes, mostly those that are Social Justice issues like:

Homelessness and the Criminalization of Behaviors Associated with Homelessness

Equal Rights for the LGBTQIA+ community, especially the Transgender community

Low Income/Affordable Housing

Women's Right to the Healthcare Choices, or any choices for that matter, made regarding THEIR BODIES

I STAND against RACISM, BIGOTRY, MISOGYNY, XENOPHOBIA, and HATE IN ANY FORM

Those are just some, but I definitely do not limit myself to these. These just happen to be the issues I am passionate about. I will join others and STAND with them against injustices committed by oppressors against marginalized people and communities!!!